* Elephant Stew *

Cut elephant into 1-inch cubes, frequently adding pinches of salt and pepper (this should take approximately 72 days).

Add enough gravy to cover.

Cook over kerosene fire about 4 weeks at 465°.

If more than 3,800 people are expected, 2 rabbits may be added, but do this only if necessary, as most people do not like to find hare in their stew.